The Power Transformation Podcast

94. BEST OF EPISODE - Youth Empowerment: How to Transform Kids in an Ever Changing World with Mark Sturdivant

Alethea Felton Season 2 Episode 94

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In this "BEST OF" episode, educator, motivational speaker, and former professional NFL athlete, and a longtime friend of mine, Mark Sturdivant, explores the significance of mentoring and inspiring youth in a rapidly changing world. Mark not only shares his personal journey, but he also discusses the hurdles young people face, and offers practical strategies for overcoming these challenges. By recognizing our collective responsibility in shaping future leaders, Mark encourages listeners of all ages to become advocates for children and harness their potential for a brighter tomorrow.

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Alethea Felton:

Here in the United States, the school year is starting to be in full swing and I figured that, as August nears its end, what better best of episode than to do one where someone is talking about youth with Mark Sturdivant, who is a motivational speaker, seasoned educator and truly a passionate lover of empowering children of all ages. This is definitely an episode that you don't want to miss, because in this you will hear how Mark has spent many, many decades pouring into youth, and he shares his background as well, from his humble beginnings all the way to now being one of the most sought after speakers in just not the Washington DC area, but across the country. So join me for this amazing best of episode with a longtime friend of mine, mark Sturdivant. Hey, mark.

Mark Sturdivant:

Hello, how you doing, mrs Felton, how's it going? I love your smile, as always.

Alethea Felton:

Thank you. Thank you so much. It's so great to have you up here. Mark and I go way back and it is truly an honor for him to be on this podcast today, and we are going to jump right into this. And I always ask a question that is impromptu, not scripted, but this is a question for you, just so that we can get to know a bit more about you. Ok, that question is this If you could eat your favorite meal, the perfect favorite meal, what would it be and why?

Mark Sturdivant:

If I could eat the perfect favorite meal, what would it be and why?

Alethea Felton:

Yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

Well, it would have to be my meal that I prepare for myself, because I think I'm a great cook. So it would be definitely smoked barbecue ribs on the grill for roughly about 10 hours, slow cooked, and I would just they would fall off the bone and I would eat them as a delicate testing. Okay, that would probably be my meal that I would eat. And why I would eat that? Because I just love the therapeutic part of prepping, the time it takes to cook, so you just put love into that, so just automatically, you know, just the ribs, barbecue ribs off the grill.

Alethea Felton:

So, on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the greatest Mark, how good are your ribs?

Mark Sturdivant:

You know, felton, I'm going to have to put them on a level of 12. You know I'm braggadocious when it comes to my food. You know we had a plan earlier. You know we had a plan of big plates playing big plates, uh, but big, big plates. You remember that? Yes, I do. Yes, yeah, but you know it was something that could have taken off. But we're in different, different lanes now but yeah, yeah we both enjoy the essence of cooking.

Alethea Felton:

Uh, and I know, as you know, as as a nutritionist, if I had to really put my foot into something and really enjoy just one last bite, it would be some barbecue ribs that I make, that nobody else makes, that I make and so I'm really glad you actually said that, because y'all I will say, you know I have had Mark's ribs and for him to put them, you know, probably at a 12, that's actually being very modest, because he does make exceptional ribs and when he did cookouts back in the day and everything like that, you know they were always probably hands down the best cookouts I had ever been to yeah, it would be the highlight.

Mark Sturdivant:

So oh, lord it would be the highlight, yeah, the highlight, yeah. Everybody would ask did you make that, did you make this? I made every day, so you know now we're both living healthier lifestyles yeah, that's true you know we can't, we can't prepare eat that too much anymore based upon our healthy lifestyle, some of our food choices, but if it was just one last bite that I wanted, it would be my ribs.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah. So I really appreciate that because now we can transition and, like Mark said, we have history. That's a totally different episode that we will never do.

Mark Sturdivant:

but we have 10 episodes oh my gosh but between your family and all that you already know.

Alethea Felton:

Yes, that is the joy of growth, maturity, y'all. I won't go into depth, because this is not what this is about, but when I tell you, life comes full circle and Mark and I have history and the fact we can come now, all these years later, and do this for a purpose, a cause, because both of us have grown up a lot and I truly appreciate that. Now, with that aside, mark, briefly tell us, if a person were to ask you this question, what would you say? Who is Mark Sturdivant?

Mark Sturdivant:

That's a great question and that's been asked of me before.

Alethea Felton:

felton and um, and I can call you felt right, is that fine, of course, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, uh-huh but if I, that's a great question.

Mark Sturdivant:

I was asked that before, a couple of years ago, and I really did not know the answer to that question because I really did not know myself that well and I'm a grown grown man. But with Mark Sturdivant and bodies that I've come to fruition with myself is captivating, positive relationships and holding on to integrity on to integrity, following through with what I say and do.

Mark Sturdivant:

Family and God always are encompassing my body. And then I think the last thing is really, really engaging in youth today to better, just to change the climate and culture of mindset of children, children to make them the best people who they can be, and then hopefully, I can be an example through all the test trials that I've been through Remember, that's another episode.

Mark Sturdivant:

But, all the test trials that I've been through and my experience that I've been through, that hopefully I can curb one or many or global children and just really give them love, affection and structure and a positive note to help shift their mindset. And that's really what encompasses me, that's what really drives me, that's my passion, that's on the same level as my family and God and I always want to put that foot forward and I can never see myself outside of that realm of trying to help change mindsets, and children and adults too as well.

Alethea Felton:

So, with that, what you have now is a platform that I've been watching for a while, and it is actually an acronym, a part of your last name, which actually spell out S-T-U-R-D-I Sturdy. What is Sturdy, what does it mean and how did you come up with it? What is the story that brought you to Sturdy, which empowers youth?

Mark Sturdivant:

OK, so Sturdy to me first off. I've been called Sturdy all of my life. Like it hasn't been a moment to where people have not called me Sturdy, including my parents.

Alethea Felton:

That's right.

Mark Sturdivant:

Like my father, when I was playing football I was Sturdy, sturdy including my parents, that's right.

Mark Sturdivant:

Like my father, when I was playing football, I used to go Sturdy, sturdy, like it wouldn't be a time to where somebody did not call me Sturdy, which was my nickname all going through growing up and it was short for my last name, and I always have been presented by my father and my family as Sturdivant, as being such a powerful last name and do not tarnish your last name. So people call me Sturdy and when I thought about Sturdy it was like, yeah, sturdy's powerful, sturdy's a sign of structure and being a man at six, four, 300 pounds of stature, sturdy, kind of fit. And then one day, to be very honest and transparent, I was sitting with a group of friends and I said you know, I want to develop something that represents my name and a company and try to really scale it to the point where I can use my last name as a platform. And I was up one night and one of my best friends was like hey, sturdy, why don't you make your name an acronym? What?

Alethea Felton:

does it mean?

Mark Sturdivant:

What does it mean? What does Sturdy mean? I was like, well, it's short for my last name. He said, but no, what does it mean? And I was like, wow, so what encompasses that? And I was like, well the S, let me just write out sturdy on a board. And that's exactly what I did and I said, well, s means success.

Alethea Felton:

Okay.

Mark Sturdivant:

T takes, the U is ultimate, and then all the acronyms are resilience, determination, inspiration, and that's what kind of has been embodied in me by other people you know, from football coaches to parents, to family, to extended family, and that is what has just been encompassed in myself and I said well, I'm going to present me to others, Let me encompass what sturdy means to others and that's success takes ultimate resilience, determination, inspiration, Because of the fact you're going to have all these different pitfalls in life, you're going to have all these different obstacles in life and you're going to have all these different failures in life, and you're going to have to be sturdy through these times, especially through this world that you're going to have to try to maintain your determination, your inspiration and all the things that are encompassed with sturdy means, and your resilience, too, as well.

Alethea Felton:

So let's pause there and we'll come back to it in terms of, specifically, what you do to help empower youth, but I want us to go back some. You've mentioned this a couple of times and I want the audience to get a broader perspective and sharper insight as to who you are. You've brought up football a few times For people that don't know you at all, because there are going to be several people who are just getting to know you. Tell us about that. Why did you bring up football? How was football a part of you? Tell us that journey only because it's a key part of what has brought you here now.

Mark Sturdivant:

Sure, I will definitely say this, being a student athlete, but now just a student athlete I call them scholar athletes. But being a student athlete and having so much of a passion towards a sport, I definitely feel if I did not play football or football was not a part of my structure, I would not be the person of who I am today. And I say that in a way to where I would have been successful without the sport, but probably in a different way. I learned so much through sports. I think through athletics you learn so much. You learn how to build relationships with other people. You learn how to take instruction from adults like your coaches. You learn how that you have a fan base that helps support you and then allows those people to support you. You have to be able to allow that and be humble with that too. You have to learn how to earn a starting spot, which takes time. It just doesn't come overnight. You're just not giving anything. You have to be able to go through failure.

Mark Sturdivant:

If you get hurt during a game or if you lose a game, you have to learn how to come back from that.

Mark Sturdivant:

And I think that's what that has developed me and shaped me to the point where my friends and I we talk about it all the time, 30 years later. We talk about how football has nurtured us. We talk about the environment that we were in in terms of our coaches and how they nurtured us, how our parents supported the coaches, the team, the school which made us a powerhouse. In high school and through college I became co-captain of a Division I football team here versus Maryland College Park, Go Terps. But I became a co-captain, which is one of the highest honors that you could get from your team. Your teammates you know the coaches don't don't vote for you your teammates vote for you and that's one of the highest honors that you could receive, especially in a Division One school, which seems so surreal to me. But when I'm really looking back at it and who I am, I've put in that work for that. I was that leader and I'm trying to still show and exemplify that, even at the age where I am now. It's just still incredible.

Alethea Felton:

So briefly, how old were you when you started playing football?

Mark Sturdivant:

Oh well, that's a story in itself. I did not touch a football or a football helmet, or a football pad or a football field anything related to football until my sophomore year in high school, high school, exactly.

Alethea Felton:

So I knew that part and I wanted you to actually say that part because it leads to a person a child, a teenager, whomever leads to them saying that, no matter the obstacle or the odds against them, they are going to be determined. Who instilled that in you? That despite you being a sophomore in high school, you still could make it to a D1 school? And something else that I will share is that Mark um he played pro also, and so for a person who had odds against them, mark, what was it or who was it specifically that really made you know you could do this?

Mark Sturdivant:

So that's that's a great question. It's two things, and I was just talking about this earlier today. It's really two things, and I was just talking about this earlier today. It's really two things. It's really the people who you surround yourself with, who support you, that make you successful. So I looked at my teammates. I looked at my family my father, my uncles, who all played football, my cousins who played football on a level, my brother. I look at my mother the mothers who support my mother's team. I look at how your village is around you that helps, support you to be successful.

Mark Sturdivant:

And then, even in high school, we won our state championship football team. I mean our state championships in the state of Maryland, and if you look at all the people who played, they had the same type of network, the same type of system as I had to make a successful team in the state of Maryland. So you have to surround yourself with people who are supporting you, not supporting your passion, supporting what you want to do, but really supporting you in terms of like, hey, you might not know this skill well because I didn't start till late, but you have coaches all around you, you have players all around you, you have people around you that are in your best interest, to best help you, and I really, truly believe. The second thing is you have to be able to believe in yourself, and that takes time.

Mark Sturdivant:

I remember when this happens in stages. I remember going into my senior year of high school that I knew I had the potential to go to college. I had confidence in me, in my ability, in my size, my stature. I just had a certain amount of confidence, and it wasn't cockiness, but it was a certain amount of confidence that I had not only in myself, but in my teammates but generally in me, that I had other people that were relying on me to do the best that I could, every minute on that field to excel to the next level. And that's what kind of transpired in high school that the village around me and then getting to know who I am at that time that I wanted to be successful, I kind of knew who I was.

Mark Sturdivant:

And then I also remember in college the time where I was just like in a zone.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

The way I like. When I mean like a, a zone, like how Michael Jordan gets in the zone, it's 60 points and, like you can't, he's just not even thinking, he's just going for it yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

I never forget my junior year. Things just started clicking because I got to know myself, I got to know my position. I got to know who I am. I got to know my position. I got to know who I am, I got to know my ability. And I think that goes in stages of life Like we're transitioning even to a point of where we're educators, we're entrepreneurs, we're these things. These are all transitions to where you have to get to know who you are. You have to get to know. No, you have to know. Get to know who you are, you have to know what your potential is and you got to really hone in and craft on your potential and I think that's big for people to know that. You got to believe in yourself and also you got to look yourself in the mirror to hold yourself accountable for what you're doing, what you're not doing so.

Alethea Felton:

It was those two factors of having your village and then having your own confidence that helped you to excel in high school Springbrook High School in Maryland and then college, then to the pros and then overseas and then you got injured. And so after you got injured and you had to leave football, you still didn't let that actually stop you. You started to then shape your life around helping youth. Mark tell us about what was it specifically? You could have gone into the corporate world. You could have taken so many different routes. You could have continued, even in jobs dealing with pro sports, college sports to youth and that youth need me, and you went the route of being a school educator, administrator, et cetera. What led you there and why youth?

Mark Sturdivant:

So when I was a student athlete at University of Maryland, my senior year, we developed a program actually a class they still do today for student athletes to go out in the community to speak to, I would say, underserved kids.

Alethea Felton:

Okay, yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

In the Baltimore area it was called the Summer of Service.

Mark Sturdivant:

In the Baltimore area it was called the summer of service and I worked all summer leading up to my senior football year, going to different schools to speak to children from elementary on up to high school and it was a rewarding feeling because every underserved child wants to be an athlete or a professional athlete. Or it might be a dream of, I'm saying, like 75, 80%. You didn't hear, I wanted to be a lawyer, doctor, fireman, policeman. You heard, I wanted to be an athlete, professional athlete, and I was on that course to being a professional athlete and we spoke to maybe over maybe 30 to 40 schools. That was kind of like our job to do our internship and it really showed me the connection that I had working with children and I knew from that point on it was just something in me. From that point on I said I want to serve a community. Okay, I said I want to serve a community or communities of adolescent children that want to fight for a dream that they might not know a background of a millionaire but might have other trauma.

Mark Sturdivant:

That goes on within that type of environment don't know how to code, switch to be. In a certain way, I always say I always said this the big eye in the sky doesn't lie, and that means God doesn't lie. Or people are watching, or people are watching you and when you're doing things and you think you're not under a microscope and somebody sees what you're doing and it could be a negative thing. But it could be something that could hinder your dream, Whether it be if you wanted to go be a professional athlete great. If you wanted to make it to college great, Even if you wanted to make your high school team great. But people are always watching to see how you act, your character, your demeanor, your integrity, how you dress everything across the board, and I would always want to bring that different type of element of what you need to work to get there, based upon your attitude and how hard and consistent you need to work and be determined in doing so.

Mark Sturdivant:

And that all comes back into the part of you know surrounding yourself with a village and then knowing who you are. But, like, when your village is not around you, how do you act? And how do you, how do you just manifest yourself into that person who really is a great person that somebody would want on their team, because that plays a big part of being on somebody's team. Sometimes it's not all about athletic ability, it's about attitude. Yeah, and that goes even in the present day of the work that I do. Now, if I came in with a negative attitude, working in front of a group of one child or 300, I just came with a negative attitude. You would feel that coming in the room, that's right yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

Why would you want that? You know, so you have to put yourself in a, in a, in a place to where you are supported, but you know who you are at that time. To get to that climactic moment, to where you kind of just let out all your information and everything that you want to do the best curve of mindset of an adolescent child and I've had in my educational career plenty of success stories Like children who are 30 plus years old I've worked with when I was younger. We still communicate.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

You know, I get testimonies all the time and calls from kids, either via Facebook, instagram, that like just saying a thank you, and that to me is huge. If I could just reach one, teach one change, one that's making the world a better place, and hopefully they're transferring that information to their children or to somebody else playing the scene with somebody else.

Alethea Felton:

And I was actually going to ask that in terms of how has the work you've done with youth over the years manifested into their lives now and you just touched on that in terms of some kids who were children then, often troubled, honestly, often troubled. Let's be very transparent. Yeah, yeah, who who grew up trouble with trauma?

Alethea Felton:

yes trouble, with a lot of trauma, but yet have found their way through life and have come back and have thanked you for it, and that right there speaks for itself. And so, talking about Sturdy, this organization you have where you do specifically talk to youth okay, mark, tell us about that. How do you do it? Do you have workshops? Are you just going in speaking? How does that part of your life look? And what is the mission and the purpose behind Sturdy? Because nowadays everybody gives a pep talk, everybody gives a speech. But what makes you stand out? What makes your program different?

Mark Sturdivant:

So I think what makes my program different is the follow-up. How so follow-up, how so?

Alethea Felton:

I'm a true believer that and it could be a group of one child or a group of 500.

Mark Sturdivant:

I'm a true believer in you could come in and you could speak to a child and you could be glorified as this big figure, professional figure, that's a keynote speaker. But the biggest follow-up that you can get, you could say a dynamite speech of inspiration, dynamite, but people are only going to remember at that time. But if you follow up and revisit that school, that group of kids, whatever you may do that workshop, if you follow up, you get more credibility and more purpose to those children than you would just saying hey, let me speak to you, bye, I'm gone. They want to see a real life person going, I'm gone. They want to see a real life person going through it. They want to see a real life connection. And then you can make a connection. It is so easy to now with um, with, uh, the different platforms. Yeah, do so. I'll give you an example. I did a workshop at old mill Middle School in Anne Arundel County and I was just asked to come one time and I was so involved in the kids that were there. It was about 12 kids I was so they were so excited to see me the first time because it was like, oh, he played ball, he did this, he did that. See me the first time because it was like, oh, he played ball, he did this, he did that. But when I came back a second time, a third time and a fourth time, they found out like, hey, this person has a lot of integrity, consistency in this program. And then I wanted to scale what, not just what I spoke about with them, but I wanted to actually show them so how to develop the division. I mean a vision board, okay, how to do that. What does fellowship look like when you sit down and eat with other people?

Mark Sturdivant:

Now, fellowship is big, especially with the Afro-American community or just the community in general. People eat as families. Kids don't know how to eat as families anymore. We're always on the go. So, having a fellowship day where you come in, I bring food and then that's prepared by me, that we can sit down and eat and go through. Why are we eating here? What are we blessed for? That's a different developmental skill that sometimes kids don't have, that they can transform, transform. And then we do. We do writing shop, workshops on like character development, goal setting. We went to the vision boards. But goal setting, and then how do you manifest that? So you set goals and how do you work back to achieve them. Manifest that, so you set goals and how do you work back to achieve them. And that's how you really get to the adolescent. You follow up. Anybody can come in and do like some of my famous public speakers Les Brown they're big names, you know they're big names.

Mark Sturdivant:

A couple of weeks ago I went to Willie Jolly oh yes.

Mark Sturdivant:

Who's a local, native DC. I have now more connection with him in terms of relationship because he said Mark, here's my cell phone number, give me a call. And I give him a call and he talks to me like I'm his best friend. But that makes that connection is now he's not turning me down, no matter what status you are, and I think that's key, especially when it comes to children. They want to see follow up, they want to see somebody who's consistent, and it can be as simple as a text message. It's as simple as like how are you doing? Yeah, it's as simple as like how are you doing?

Mark Sturdivant:

Can trigger something positive, especially in a youth and a child, that could propel them to the next level. Sometimes. And it all goes back to the village and I've been in underserved areas and but even in the populations who have the means to still need that help, they still need that support. They still do. I go back to a story of a family member that I've had and he was like Mark, you always, I love that, you always bringing. Okay, he said it. Just like he said I always love that you bring kids from. He said it just like I always love that you bring kids from. Let's be very transparent.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah, go ahead.

Mark Sturdivant:

And I don't believe in the hood, but, yeah, the hood, but whatever categorizes you as the hood, but you're always bringing them to see a different vision of what reality could be, of course, and I always come back and say you know, kids who are underserved are some of the biggest survivors ever. They have more tools and better tools to be successful than a child who already has. And I never forget my cousin was like well, mark, we have the means, we have everything. He said, but I need you to talk to my son. And I was like talk to your son before. He's good, he's driving to high school, he's doing this, he's like he's not good.

Mark Sturdivant:

And I reached out and talked to my cousin at that time and you know what? There was a lot going on and you would think that he was living in a perfect world and he wasn't. And that also gave me a balance of saying you know what? Sometimes it's just not always. You know, working in one population of adolescent children, it's working in the development of all children, because all children now are carrying some type of of trauma-based, and trauma based doesn't have to be always negative. Trauma-based could be like I'm on the internet 10 hours a day.

Mark Sturdivant:

You know what I'm saying but, but there's always some type of a root cause for that though yeah, or something exactly right, yeah that, that I believe that, as an educator, as a person who's passionate about it, or anybody's passionate about can kind of get to a root cause or the best help get out of that that hole that that child might be in, or to inspire them in a different way where they can say you can give them something in my life.

Alethea Felton:

Hey, I can do this, some sort of tool, some sort of experience based that I've been through something that can land into a child's lap to make a light bulb go off. That leads to my next question is, say, for a person that's listening now, and whether or not they have children of their own. We all know kids, we all know youth. It's so easy for adults to say how quote-unquote bad kids are now, or kids are always doing this or kids are always doing that. But let's be real about it. Who's raising them? Okay, it's our generation raising these kids. So it's very easy to say what the kids aren't doing, but it goes back to what we are, their village, we are the ones raising them. And yes, I say we. Whether or not a person has biological kids or not, we all hold a responsibility. And so what would you say? What are three practical things, three simple things that a person could do to help transform the life of a child in a positive way. What are three practical things they can do?

Mark Sturdivant:

So I'm going to say this, lead into the three things you cannot be afraid. As a parent, as an adult, as a person who wants to make positive impact, you have to take that first step, to not be afraid to approach. There's many times where you can see a group of individuals walking down the street and you go on the other side of the street. There's many times that you might see, uh, an adolescent child, and this just happens to be sitting on the bench crying, and you just walk by like it's not my business. There's many times to where I'll go back to me after a game and you lose a game and you somebody might just tell you'll be OK, you'll be OK, it's all right, but in that child's mind it's not OK. So my thing is this you can't walk by and ignore what's going on and you can't be selfish with it.

Mark Sturdivant:

What's going on, and you can't be selfish with it Even if you have children, you can't be selfish with yourself of not to try to reach out, to try to change the dynamic of the way our adolescents are. And it doesn't make any difference what culture it is Black, white.

Alethea Felton:

Asian, latino, it doesn't make a difference.

Mark Sturdivant:

We have to learn how to start taking care of all of us and not just your own.

Alethea Felton:

Okay.

Mark Sturdivant:

And I'm a big believer in that. So the first thing I would say to do to make some change is be approachable. You have to be able to be approachable. Okay, and I'm not saying you don't watch yourself, but you have to be able to be approachable. It doesn't make a difference what environment you're in. You have to allow yourself to be approachable. Second thing is this your value is not always everybody else's value.

Mark Sturdivant:

So you can't inflict your value system on somebody else who does not want to receive it. So you have to be able to communicate in a way to where, as long as it's going in a positive direction, you have to be able to communicate in a way to where they can pick something out of what you said to apply to them in daily life. So it's almost you can't tell them what to do. You almost have to allow children to figure it out on their own. Their light bulb has to come, go off too, and then I'm going back to the third thing is just really follow up if you choose that channel, no matter it may be.

Mark Sturdivant:

It could be like hey, it could be as simple as can I text you later. It could be as simple as would you like to do dinner or lunch, or it could be as simple as like, and it could be the whole environment and I say this too, sometimes going in, like some of the environments that I've been in. You have to be able to show some empathy, for that too as well. You have to have a heart and saying you know what? This is your situation Now. You do not like it, but it can change. It can change no matter what. And then that just has to break the cycle. And that's the toughest part is like how do you break the cycle? So that means the follow-up has to be consistent. You have to be consistent with that communication with that child. You'll see change. You'll see change and then the light bulb go on in their mind. It might be when they're 10, it might be when they're 30, but that's going to go off at some point in time.

Mark Sturdivant:

uh, with that. So you know you and then you as a person have to have a belief that everybody can change at any point, like you, me and you talked about it earlier in the show, like we've seen you grow more and I know I have. Yeah, you knew me when I was really young.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah, yeah, uh-huh, yes, I did and I went through a lot yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

I went through a lot. So just evolving.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

Getting to know who you are and the follow up, and then I'll use you as an example. Phelps, I'll use you as an example. It's been going on 15 plus years that I've known you. You've never given up on me.

Alethea Felton:

You might have taken it huh I really appreciate that, because I've never given you've never given.

Mark Sturdivant:

You've had to take a pause from me.

Alethea Felton:

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

Yeah, okay, you've never given up. Yes.

Alethea Felton:

Uh-huh.

Mark Sturdivant:

You know what I'm saying. Yes, I totally get it. So just think of a child understands that and they hear. Sometimes you hear all the time children feel defeated when they think they don't have anybody in their corner. But just think of a child knows that. Yeah, I could take a pause from you, but I still love you enough that we need something you can come back in. And how you come back in is showing your growth. Then that means everything. It gives a sign of hope, a sign of comfort, a sign of support and a sign of love.

Mark Sturdivant:

And then I gotta say this that's the village part.

Mark Sturdivant:

Yeah, but then you know, people might not like what I'm saying about this, but as parents, sometimes we need to get on our A game to best facilitate what happens with our kids too as well. You know, we, we, we as parents, parent figures, father figures, mother figures, just as a village, we can't have that negative attitude or those negative interactions that have no solutions behind it, that keep a repetitive cycle going on within our world that best does not help an adolescent child. I've had parents that have belittled their children so bad because the parent is not able enough or does not want their child to exceed them educationally.

Alethea Felton:

I've seen that over the years, which to me is horrible. I've seen that over the years, which to me is horrible.

Mark Sturdivant:

They'll keep a defeatist attitude on their child instead of want to see them excel. And it can be as simple as saying I love you and I want the best for you and that child will excel.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah, so you know, I'll say this, I'm not a parent yet, but I am a father figure and you have raised children.

Mark Sturdivant:

I have See, people don't understand this. I have walked. I've been honored enough to walk one of my students down the aisle.

Alethea Felton:

You are not a biological father, but you have raised children. Yeah, and blood does not always make a parent. Anybody can give birth, anybody can have a child, but it's a difference. When you're raising that child, you've had loved ones to actually come and live with you. You have seen people through some very very serious stages in their life.

Alethea Felton:

And we could go on and on and on, but I wanted to just kind of close there in terms of talking about ways that we can empower youth. And the last question I want to ask you, prior to you sharing how people can contact you for speaking events, is this Not just speaking events. Okay, so you can clarify Wait a minute, really bad, really bad. You can clarify that. A minute really bad, really bad. You can clarify that when we get to it, okay, you can correct it, then hold on a second, okay.

Alethea Felton:

So the uh, closing question, though, that I want to ask you is this this how can a person so, for example, such as yourself, having 30, but although you saying you don't yet have biological kids? I want to talk about the importance of legacy, because sometimes people hear that word and think you only leave legacy if you have your own children, and that's not true. So my question for you is how do you see your legacy of empowering youth, empowering children, outliving you? So when you die at 100, how will this continue and live on beyond you, and what can we do to help create a legacy of youth empowerment and transformation, empowerment and transformation.

Mark Sturdivant:

I have a old not an old saying. I just have a saying that's always fixated in my head about leaving a legacy. And then, when leaving a legacy with adolescent children, it's continually planting seeds in others. You have to give a service or you have to give some of your knowledge positive knowledge to others, to you, so they can reciprocate that into somebody else. That was at a stop there for a second. But you have to give, you have to reciprocate that within youth of today, you have to be able to continue to plant seeds.

Mark Sturdivant:

Emphasize I have emphasized to my youth, whether they have kids or not, that it's your duty to make sure that you instill what somebody's instilled in you in a positive way into somebody else, and that could be how to create generational wealth, that could be how to run business, that could be how to be a better parent, that could be how can I be a better support system. All these different factors that somebody else is pointing to you. You need to point to somebody else or you need to point to somebody else double time. No, but you have to point into that and I go back. It does take a village.

Mark Sturdivant:

I had an honest, earnest conversation with my nephew family last night going into the seventh grade Probably one of the best conversations I've had with him. It was all wrapped around school. It was all wrapped around his activities and distractions he has in school and it was funny. Some of his answers with distractions were girls. He said one about fitting in just fitting in yeah, so having those distractions, but the conversation that I have for him was something totally different, but aligned with what his father had told him too, wow.

Mark Sturdivant:

But he understood it. So I'm reinforcing it, but I'm saying it. Father told him too, but he understood it. So I'm reinforcing it, but I'm saying it in a different way and he's under my own. So to me that's building legacy as well. So it's like how are you building up the youth of today for the better of tomorrow, and how are they building it up, no matter what age they are? How are they building themselves up to be better, productive citizens, to pass on some of the knowledge to the next part of the youth, to build up our whole world, to make it a better place?

Alethea Felton:

This will see it. Yeah, this will see it, that's well said.

Mark Sturdivant:

Yeah, that's well said. That's building legacy.

Alethea Felton:

Yeah, yes, because all of us can think of somebody, even if that person wasn't our actual parent. We can all think of somebody who poured something into us that has helped make us who we are now. So that was perfectly stated, yeah.

Mark Sturdivant:

Yeah, that's the legacy, exactly, and you can't be selfish with building that type of legacy. You know you cannot, whether it's in our culture or with anybody else's culture. That's how you build capacity within the world to make it a better place and you're building future leaders.

Alethea Felton:

That's right.

Mark Sturdivant:

And that's building legacy of leaders. That's how you build it. Just continue to plant seeds and then actually and actually, hopefully and I said this to a lot of my students you have to promise to me that what I'm giving to you that you have to give to somebody else or another person you have to promise me. I'm giving you stuff that my father gave me, that my uncles gave me, my father's friends gave me. I'm wishing that I had that now. But, to answer to your question, I'm also realizing that my father rest in peace. I love him. My father even your father has instilled things in me that I've passed on to some others, that other children that are building legacy between me. So once I die, hopefully that is repetitive, but hopefully it's just magnified in terms of building legacy and that could be any character that could be, being kind to a person, doing an act of a service.

Mark Sturdivant:

It doesn't always have to be financial. It could be an act of service. How do you serve yourself in the community? What do you do?

Alethea Felton:

It can definitely go a lot of different ways, and I do appreciate you even saying that about my dad. He listens every week, so he is going to be happy to hear that shout out. But hey look, so you corrected me and I'm going to give you the chance to now what I want you to do now, and I also have these in the actual show notes I want you to tell people where they can contact you for speaking engagements. But you said that's not all you do, so I want you now to just clarify briefly in a minute or two how people can contact you and what services you provide.

Mark Sturdivant:

Sure. So the way people can contact me is via my webpage, and it's wwwsturdyorg. So that's S-T-U-R-D-I, dot O-R-G. So it's wwwsturdyorg. There's a section there where you can actually put in a request of what you would like. I can also be reached on my Facebook page. You can DM me there on Mark Sturdevant. That's M-A-R-K-S-T-U-R-D-I-V-A-N-T, and then I can also be reached on Instagram and that's Sturdy31. So that's S-T-U-R-D-I, the number three and the number one, so it's 3031. If you go through my website, definitely my management team will reach back out to you. I do everything from public speaking to keynote speaking, motivational speaking, anything from workshops with adolescent children, coaching clinics with teachers, adult staff, and then my biggest thing now that I'm doing now is restorative circles and restorative justice for conflict resolution. So I'm definitely enjoying that aspect of sturdy. And then the leadership. But if schools need coaching on culture and climate and those things, I think I'm a guru with that too as well.

Alethea Felton:

So a question Do you do virtual presentations in terms of speaking?

Mark Sturdivant:

Yes, I do I have listeners everywhere. Sure, I do do virtual presentations. Now I do. I love in-person presentations because you get more of me, but I do do virtual presentations and virtual coaching too, as well.

Alethea Felton:

Okay, perfect. Well, I will tell you, it has truly been an honor yet again and I thank you for sharing up here today and I thank you for just really doing the work you have done over the years. You know I shared with you. I am now a former public school educator, but even during the time that I was, for 20 years, you know, I definitely know how important it is to help our youth and to help our children, and I'm glad that you're still doing that in the same light and also with this podcast premise. You know, power transformation. As I stated offline and I will share publicly, I also think it's really a blessing just to see the growth that you've made, that I've made, to even bring us to this point, and that's what happens when we actually put in work and it's continued work to be our best selves. So I truly appreciate you, thank you.

Mark Sturdivant:

Nah, I definitely appreciate you too, Felton, for allowing me to be on the podcast. Definitely might need to get on one more time. It's just me on a personal one.

Alethea Felton:

We'll see.

Mark Sturdivant:

We will see how that goes and I definitely enjoyed it. Definitely, let's both continue to push each other and let's both continue to push others. You know, like I said, we're both like you're an ex educator, but you're really not. You're still educated, you know. So that's in you. So we just got to go back to that. One question about the legacy, like how are you going to continue the legacy? You will still continue to plant your values, your opinions, your knowledge into somebody else. You do it in me, so you're still creating a legacy with me as well, and we can still do that with our adolescent youth as well, because it in me. So you're still creating a legacy with me as well, and we can still do that with our adolescent youth as well, because it's needed.

Alethea Felton:

If you enjoyed today's show, then you don't want to miss an episode, so follow the Power Transformation Podcast on Apple Podcasts, spotify or wherever you usually listen, and remember to rate and review. I also invite you to connect with me on social media at Alethea Felton. That's at A-L-E-T-H-E-A-F-E-L-T-O-N. Until next time, remember to be good to yourself and to others.