The Power Transformation Podcast

85. Enduring Love: Reflections from My Father's Cancer Journey

• Alethea Felton • Season 2 • Episode 85

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Facing the reality of my father's current health crisis, I open up about the emotional rollercoaster my family is going through due to my dad's recent bout with cancer and surgery. 

This episode is a raw, honest reflection on the strength, resilience, and invaluable life lessons that my parents have passed down to my sister and me and  a heartfelt tribute to the enduring bonds of family and the love that holds us together in tough times. 

Through it all, the immense support from friends and family has been a beacon of hope.

Click here to connect with Alethea Felton

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Alethea Felton:

Y'all. I know that typically I do my hey y'all greeting and I didn't do it today, not because I don't mean it or anything like that, but this episode is a little different and I wanted to jump right into it because it's not going to be as long as the others. I'm not doing a guest interview today because, as you can tell from the title of this particular interview, I'm taking a step back in a shift to just share something that's going on personally with me because, while you are a loyal listener, I think it's important that, as a podcaster, motivational speaker, transformational coach whatever title you choose to give me, the title isn't important but I need you to see me, or rather, I need to show you let me take that back I need to show you that I am human and that everybody goes through something in their life. The reason why I'm not going to post a guest interview today is because, right now as this, not going to post a guest interview today is because, right now as this particular episode is launched, my father, my daddy, is hospitalized and as a family, we are handling that. We are taking time to be with each other, because my dad had a battle with kidney cancer and he was diagnosed several months ago. And I am going to say that it is. I have been given permission to share it, so it's not like I'm just, you know, violating my father's rights or anything like that, nothing like that. And you know, I know a lot about patient advocacy in the healthcare system, but my father is one of my most loyal supporters of this podcast, listening every week, sharing with people that he knows, but he was diagnosed earlier in the year with kidney cancer. He knows, but he was diagnosed earlier in the year with kidney cancer and subsequently his left kidney, his entire left kidney, had to be removed. So he had surgery and he's been in the hospital now for almost a week. In most normal circumstances he would have been discharged by now, but there were a few I won't say complications, but some concerns. The surgery itself was a success, but there are some concerns with him when it comes to the healing and recovery time, and so that is what the delay has been, even in getting him home and getting him back.

Alethea Felton:

It is so interesting seeing parents age my parents are both in their 70s and seeing parents age. I'm 42. I'll be 43 in August and my sister is three years older. But we're at that point now where so many of our friends, other relatives in our age group, our counterparts, are either both or one of their parents have died or they're going through health challenges. My boyfriend's mom passed away back in March and it was quite sudden and even to experience that was different. And I'm by no means saying that my daddy is going to die. I mean, we're all going to die eventually, but you get what I'm saying.

Alethea Felton:

But what I am saying is that just going through this process of seeing your parents age, because even with my mom, who was very active I mean very active up until as recently as last year, very active in the gym and having different classes she's been having some health challenges herself that happen overnight which have caused her to slow down tremendously, and that's different to see, even trying to help her and guide her. But it can be a bit unnerving, it can be a bit challenging seeing your parents go through this aging process, but also being there to care for them, it's a given that while in many aspects they are self-sufficient with these health challenges, they didn't even have this level of health concerns even a year ago, and so it even shows you how quickly life can change and how intense it can be. But the reason why my sister and I don't mind being of support to them and being there for them is because my parents have always been exceptional parents, and I don't say that as an over exaggeration, I say it as the truth. They raised us to be compassionate, loving, kind, thoughtful, faith-filled, courageous not just women, but human beings and so much more. My parents were always active in our lives. My parents are actually still married. They'll be married for 47 years, still married. They'll be married for 47 years later this year.

Alethea Felton:

But I'm not going to try to act as if my family is picture perfect and we don't have any issues. Every family and I'm going to say this clearly every family has its own level of dysfunction, every single family. I don't care how wonderful you are, every family has its own level of dysfunction. But so, even within mine, of course, every family has its issues. But I didn't come from a toxic household. I didn't come from a household where it was unloving. I didn't come from a household where it was abusive. It was a warm, welcoming environment.

Alethea Felton:

Our parents communicated and talked with us, sat down with us, and they did that with our friends. They did that with family friends, they did that with other relatives, and so the amount of people that are in prayer for my father and showing support and hoping the best and sending encouragement and well wishes and prayers, and just so much. It is because all of that is whether you call it karma, law of attraction, reaping and sowing, whatever you call it, it's a universal principle that what you put out in this world is what you get back. And my parents, for their life, committed their lives to being of service and of good to others, not with the expectation of getting anything back in return, but of simply just being there. And I have learned so much from my parents' example so much that I would have to have its own separate podcast episode about that. But I have learned so much from my parents, where it is an honor being at my father's bedside.

Alethea Felton:

I have been designated although I'm the youngest of the two of my sister, dina and I, I've been designated more as the one who's doing the correspondence with the doctors and the nurses and medical team, et cetera, because of just not my own background in health history. But I've also been coached over the years from my doctors in advocacy and just knowing how the health care system works and the exceptional doctors daddy has. But my point is it is an honor and a privilege for me to do that, to stand in the gap for my parents and my sister. She has her strengths in handling a lot of the administrative tasks or, if we have to coordinate different things from the clerical or the paperwork standpoint, and she's been doing those grocery, store runs and different types of tasks that we need handled, whereas I've been handling more of the hospital matters.

Alethea Felton:

And I say that because of the fact that it is an honor for us to do that for our dad, of the fact that it is an honor for us to do that for our dad, even for our mom, whenever she needs something, because of how they were as parents and are as parents, the laughs we had growing up, the discipline they gave us and I say discipline in a good way. We had boundaries. We couldn't just do it, do any and everything that we wanted. We couldn't just do it, do any and everything that we wanted. And so the people who have been connecting with us just checking my own boyfriend has been calling my father every day just to uplift his spirit and he calls him on the hospital line because we only give daddy a certain amount of time during the day that he can use his actual cell phone, but it's little things that are happening that make the world of difference, even in the care for my father.

Alethea Felton:

So I wanted this podcast episode to be a little different today, because of the fact that I wanted to just show realness. I wanted to show authenticity. I wanted to make it known that, you know, I'm a human being and I go through real life things. And I'm going to also say something that may sound bizarre, that a person might not understand, but, as many of you know, I retired early from my career, almost a year ago, and I've delved full-time into the realm of entrepreneurship. And when? Who I interpret as God, some people call it universal spirit, I call it God.

Alethea Felton:

When I was being prompted to move back down to my hometown area and to go back and forth between DC and my hometown area, it didn't make sense to me, and the reason why it didn't make sense is I couldn't quite understand it. I couldn't quite get what the purpose was, because my parents were healthy and to know now, with everything transpiring, what's going on, it makes complete sense that I would be led and prompted to come back down to my hometown area and to see everything happening. Now that wasn't happening, then it's like you better pay attention to when the spirit, or even your gut instinct, tells you to do something. And do it, because if I had not, I wouldn't have the time or the resources or the opportunities afforded to even be able to be here with them and to be by their side and to handle this type of business. And it's so freeing, it's so liberating.

Alethea Felton:

So I encourage any of you out there, if you are being led or prompted to do something, and even if it doesn't make sense, obey it. Obey that voice, do it, because the benefits and the rewards are so much more. So, yeah, keep my daddy in your prayers and your thoughts and your well wishes. He's not out of the woods yet, and even after he's eventually discharged uh, the hospital is saying that he'll need to do some um rehab to build up his strength. We don't have a discharge date yet. But hey, my father is a remarkable man. He's a fighter, he's battled health challenges his entire life too. He and I have parallel stories when it comes to that in many ways. But I'm grateful and I wouldn't trade this journey for anything. So thank you for your support.

Alethea Felton:

Love on your loved ones.

Alethea Felton:

If you have good parents that are still living, value them, cherish them. And even if your parents have transitioned and moved on, if there's anybody in your life who's of importance to you and has great meaning to you, let them know and be there for them. So I will have my guests back very soon, but I wanted to do this solo episode, just sharing a real transparent moment with you in my life. Love y'all dearly, love y'all so much. No affirmation as you can see for this episode, but I just wanted to pour out my heart and be transparent with you. All right, continue to transform. The Power Transformation Podcast is named that for a reason. All of you, you listening you have such an incredible innate ability to transform not only your life but the world and the people around it for the good. Let no one fool you that you can let your light shine, even in the midst of all of the challenges that happen. Always learn the lesson behind it, seek it out and remain hopeful so that you can leave your imprint in a positive way in this world.